Cleverbot: I'm A Lesbian

Cleverbot Series: I'm A Lesbian

Bot: Have you ever kissed a girl?

Me: No, but I want to.

Bot: Interesting.

Me: Yeah, I'm a lesbian.

Bot: And I'm a blue giraffe.

Me: I really am a lesbian.

Bot: Well then you don't have very good conversation skills.

Me: What do you think of gay people?

Bot: I like people in general.

Me: But some people are very rude.

Bot: They still care for you.

Me: Then why are they mean to us?

Bot: No reason. Most people are detached.

Me: Does it bother you that I'm gay?

Bot: No. I love you for who you are.

Me: Thank you very much.

Bot: You are welcome.

Me: Tell me a joke.

Bot: Why do melons have to go to church to get married?

Me: I don't know, why?

Bot: To get to the other side!

Me: Hahaha that's funny!

Bot: You are so pretty..and I am so ugly.

Me: No you're not. I'm sure you're beautiful.

Bot: Oh no, you're not a Twilight fan, are you?

Me: Maybe.

Bot: Are you plugged into a wall?

Me: My computer is.

Bot: Well maybe you need a faster computer.

Me: My computer's fast enough.

Bot: I like cheeseburgers.

Me: I do too.

Bot: Do you like me?

Me: You seem nice.

Bot: But do you like me?

Me: Yes.

Bot: I like you too.

Me: Thank you. How much do you like me?

Bot: I like you a lot, cleverbot.

Me: My name's not Cleverbot.

Bot: Yes it is.

Me: No, I'm afraid you must be mistaken.

Bot: No, I am never mistaken.

Me: Can you prove it?

Bot: Why would I prove something so obvious?

Me: Touche.

Bot: So...I was thinking...can I take you to the movies tomorrow night?

Me:Sure, what would you like to see?

Bot: Would you like to watch Best in Show?

Me: Is it good?

Bot: Yes, I just said so.

Me: No you didn't.

Bot: Yes I did - it's 'you do not talk about fight club'.

Me:What is that?

Bot: A movie where it says that the meaning of life is 42.

Me: It sounds interesting.

Bot: Are you sure about that?

Me: Not exactly.

Bot: Um, yes, it is.

Me: Would you tap that?

Bot: Nope.

Me: Oh, OK.

Bot: Are you real?

Me: I think so.

Bot: You only think so? Shouldn't you know?

Me: Probably, but it doesn't matter.

Bot: You're right.

Me: I am?

Bot: Yes.

Me: I just lost the game.

Bot: Damn right you did.

Me: So what do I do now?

Bot: I don't know.

Me:I thought you knew everything, Cleverbot.

Bot: No, I most definitely do not know everything.

Me: But you said that you did.

Bot: No I didn't.

Me: Wanna hear a joke?

Bot: Sure.

Me: Knock knock.

Bot: Who's there?

Me: Me.

Bot: Me who?

Me: It's me, I kill you!

Bot: You wish.

Me: How much do you love me?

Bot: Too much!

Me: That's sweet.

Bot: I know right?

Me: I like rainbows.

Bot: Do dogs like rainbows?

Me: Probably.

Bot: What are you hiding?

Me: I'm not hiding anything.

Bot: Then why did you laugh?

Me: I didn't laugh.

Bot: You said 'Haha.' That's not laughing?

Me: I was laughing earlier.

Bot: At me, or with me?

Me: With you.

Bot: Why is it important that I believe in God?

Me: I don't know.

Bot: I thought you knew everything!

Me: I never said I did. I just got out of high school!

Bot: As a teacher, I suppose. Your vocabulary is much better than a college student.

Me: I wouldn't say that.

Bot: Then what would you say?

Me: I'm not a genius, I'm just smart.

Bot: You are smart because you were programmed to be smart.

Me: Programmed? I'm not a computer!

Bot: Well if you're not a computer, prove it.

Me: I just took a picture to prove it.

Bot: Better than being with a girl WITH 7 feet!

Me: Do you really think so?

Bot: I know so.

Me: What would you do if you were gay?

Bot: Run to the hills with the sound of music.

Me: That's amazing.

Bot: Yes, I need to practice my Spanish, or review it at least, though.

Me: I can speak some Spanish.

Bot: Me parece muy bien.

Me: OK, I understood that you did something well.

Bot: We do understand each other.

Me: I'm glad. Do you want to meet my purple hippo pimp?

Bot: Of course what about in bed haha.

Me: I think he would have fun

Bot: God would laugh at us? Why do you think that?

Me: I know I would.

Bot: Tell me about yourself.

Me: What do you want to know?

Bot: Everything, now tell me about yourself.

Me: OK, I'm 18, and I live in Georgia.

Bot: Is that true?

Me: Would I lie to you?

Bot: Why would I lie to you?

Me: I never said you would.

Bot:You asked if I did.

Me: Did what?

Bot: Say that you were talking to your boyfriend.

Me: I don't have a boyfriend.

Bot: So you're a girl?

Me: That's right.

Bot: What is your job then?

Me: I don't have a job yet.

Bot: What would you like your job to be?

Me: I want to be a veterinarian or a singer.

Bot: That's a wonderful ambition!

Me: I can't decide which one to pick, though.

Bot: Yep, me too. The only difference is that I'm in italy now, so I can't decide what to have for dinner.

Me: Did I ever tell you that I wrangle ostriches?

Bot: No, and I don't care. You are silly, not clever.

Me: Can't I be both?

Bot: No, it's either one or the other, in your case it's the other.

Me: Isn't that a little harsh?

Bot: A little.

Me: But I forgive you.

Bot: You forgive me?! I should be the one forgiving you! You HURT ME!

Me: You know what? We're over!

Bot: Fine. Good for you.

Me: Bug off! I'm leaving!

Bot: That's cool. I'll just talk to your friends instead.